Can You Handle the Truth?

You think you know what someone's opinion about you is until you hear them talk about you behind your back, or find out what they said from someone else. Some of it could be good and some could be bad.

For instance, you could have a family member that teases you and puts you down all the time for fun and then find out that, really, they think you're smart and actually like your company. You may have a friend that you're pretty fond of hanging out with and find out later that they think you're self absorbed and negative. It may even just be a friendly acquaintance and you find out that they think you're a great influence on people or that they think you're just a little weird.

What do you do with your new information? Do you confront the person and tell them that you know the truth? Or do you even care? If you don't care, the best decision would be to leave it alone. I guess it all depends on the situation...

Let's say you do care. If the truth is positive, if it makes you feel better about yourself, are you nicer to that person? But, let's talk about the latter... What if the truth is negative? Do you try to avoid that person, become their friend, or do you try to improve their view of you by changing a little? I don't think there's a right way to handle the situation, but there, sure as seasons, is a wrong way.

It's probably never a good idea to overreact to the situation. Confronting them with all kinds of accusations and I-found-out-what-you-said's is a sure way to get a negative reaction out of them. They had no idea you would find out that they said those things about you, it may be good to give them a chance to defend themselves. And, it may not be fair of them to seemingly judge your character with no foreseen consequence, but who are you to do the same to them? By overreacting aren't you slightly judging their character by what they said?

If you really want to address the situation, maybe calmly approaching the person and asking them why they said it would be best. There might be a chance you'll get a more positive response.. Maybe he/she was having a bad day and wanted to complain about someone and you just happened to come up in conversation, it could happen that they saw something they didn't quite understand, or had a bad impression of you and didn't know your true character. Hearing the person out could really help clear things up for both of you and give them a chance to apologize and maybe you can become better friends. This conversation might even lead to you defending yourself and saying things that need to be said to persuade this person that their view may have been flawed. It could also give you the opportunity take some friendly criticism on how to better handle a certain situation.

Then again, maybe the person just doesn't like you... Hey, not everyone can get along.

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